"Can I get you some more drinks?" the waitress asked.
"Yes." Cordelia said.
"No" Angel said.
"Did your dog just speak?" the shocked waitress asked.
"Woof" Angel said lamely.
"I think Ted wants us to leave Sweetheart" Jean-Claude said in his perfect accent.
"But we were having so much fun" Cordelia tried to stay in character.
"Speak for yourself" Angel complained. Cordelia kicked him.
"Erm.. Woof woof"
"He is my business partner" Jean-Claude said. Ignoring the talking dog. The waitress did a double take. But said nothing.
"You promised me" Cordelia pouted "No business on our honeymoon"
"I'll make it up to you" he smiled.
"Can we have the cheque?" she asked.
The waitress had another look at the dog. Sure he had talked. She left the bill on the table. Cordelia put down some money.
They met in the car park. The second of Edward's victims had been found. Quietly the bad guys were scurry back for the cover of the rocks they had crawled out from under.
"Where is Asher?" Jean-Claude asked, his French accent returned.
"He went for a piss" Spike grinned.
"Where are Anita and Jason" Jean-Claude asked.
"Full moon and killing. He went furry" Edward told him. "Anita has followed our marked men."
"Jason's a werewolf?" Cordelia asked.
"You let her go on her own?" Angel asked. Looking worriedly out into the darkness.
"She can handle herself" Edward and Jean-Claude said together. They didn't like the agreement.
Jean-Claude held out his hand to Cordelia, "Come my lady" Cordelia took his hand, "We must go for a walk and play bait" the wandered off down the dark path into a patch of moonlight.
"Angel" She called back and he scurried his furry butt after them.
"Wait for Asher. Then follow after" Edward instructed Spike. He held his lighter out to the cigarette Spike had in his mouth. To anyone watching it was a drunk asking for a light.
"Hey. You said I get to kill stuff!" Spike complained, inhaling the smoke into his unused lungs.
"You will" Edward promised.
"I don't want your bleeding leftovers mate" Edward gave Spike a chilling look. "You still have to teach me how to do that" he grinned. Edward disappeared in to the dark.
Spike heard a noise to his left. Here we go, he thought, bit of action. He swaggered round as if drunk. "Have you seen my friend? Tall bugger, can't hold his liquor" Spike stared to the left of the big man who had been joined by four others. "Was round here somewhere," Spike slurred.
"You are a dead man"
"Yeah" Spike straightened up. Squaring off with the biggest of the five. "Guess I am at that" He swung his fist, it made contact, making the circuit in his head whole. Sending a shock through his head. As it did, Asher rushed the man behind him. Snapping his neck. Another man swung a baseball bat at Spike's head. The crack rattled round in his head as he fell to the ground. Asher got the same bat on the side of his head. He held his skull as the world went black.
"Spike!" Cordelia hissed. "Spike!" she said through gritted teeth. Spike laid the other side of the bars. She was sitting on the bed of the other holding cell.
"Wah" Spike groaned eyes still closed. He rolled over on the bed. His face was bruised and his ribs felt as if they had been broken and healed while he was out cold.
"They didn't really have to kick me" He rolled again, into a stream of sunlight coming in through the high grill on the wall. His arm started to smoke. He dropped off and under the bed. Hitting his sore ribs as he went. "Bloody hell" he cursed as he slapped at his arm, putting out the flames.
"Did try and warn you" Cordelia looked at him through the bars. Spike sighed. It was going to be one of those days.
"Cosy" he said looking round the small out building's interior. "Kind of a prison motif"
"Not to my taste" Cordelia shrugged. "How about we make this a short stay?"
"I'm with you luv," Spike agreed. "How long was I out?"
"Long enough. Suns up"
"Really?" Spike asked sarcastically "Nothing gets by you. Must have got those brains from all that cheerleading. Need them to spell and balance."
"You want I should call the nice guard to open the window and let some air in Spike?" She threatened.
"No need" Spike nodded "Think I'll keep the window shut"
"Ok. Here is the deal." Cordelia started.
"If you will let me finish. Jeeze, you'd think with living so long as you have you'd learn some patience!" She snapped.
"Jean-Claude went bye bye at sunrise. Edward put a bullet in him just before he collapsed. Even had me convinced. So glad Angel doesn't do that. Too freaky"
"Cordelia" Spike sighed "Quick version"
"I am giving you the quick version," Cordelia protested.
"Oh" he said "quick. Right."
" They caught Edward after that. They reckoned they hit Asher too hard."
"They think he's dead?" Spike asked.
"Technically I'm the only one alive here. Be glad you looked less dead. You'd be out in the woods with some nasty thing chewing on your leg bone." Cordelia pointed out. Spike was about to say something deeply sarcastic, but didn't. It would have been wasted on her.
"Anita?" he asked.
"Far as I know she is still making herself a pain in their collective asses. She probably had found the boys and put them somewhere safe. They were the cavalry."
"Everything's going to plan then" Spike checked off the list in his head.
"You didn't ask about Angel." Cordelia wasn't surprised. No love lost there.
"Getting de-dogged and applying hair gel," Spike guessed.
"You are the grieving widow then?" Spike reminded her.
"Still don't like this bit of the plan" Cordelia moaned
"Cordelia, please" He stressed, "Do your best. We need all the over acting we can get"
"If I had something to throw at you, I would. I am a professional Actress. I do not over act. I act just enough."
"Throw me your blanket love and get into character" Spike hurried back on the bed and used Cordelia's blanket to cover himself.
Cordelia was curled in a sobbing mess. The guard came in and stared at her. "Stop with the snivelling girl" he growled.
"You killed him," She wailed.
"Not me personally. But he is dead." He made his way up to bars. "You'll be joining him soon enough"" he stated.
Cordelia sniffled wide-eyed.
"You are to be given to the commander. Such innocence. A fitting sacrifice"
"Hey buddy. I ain't anybody's sacrifice" Spike groaned. So much for the subtle plan. He thought, probably take too long any way.
The guard rattled his gun against the bars. She stopped and stared at the gun. The guard looked over to Spike's still form under the blanket. "You don't shut up girl and we see what a bat can do to you. "
The guard opened the door to Spike's cell. Spike lay very still. "Come on. Get up" he ordered the figure under the blanket. The guard got closer. Nudged him with the gun. "I said get up" Spike mumbled something. The guard got closer. "What did you say?" Spike burst out from under the blanket with his game face on. The startled man leapt back.
Cordelia hit him over the head through the bars with the bed leg. "He said, curiosity can leave you with a headache." Cordelia wiped her eyes. "Get me out of here"
"What ever the lady wishes" Spike put on his French accent and searched the guard for the keys. He grabbed the gun and slung the strap round him. He kicked the man in the ribs, hard. His chip zapped him. He cringed and held his head.
"Petty much" Cordelia waved for the keys. Spike threw them to her and grinned.
"Worth it. Come on lets go do what we are good at"
"I know what I'm good at Spike," She said, unlocking the door. "I've yet to discover what you are good at"
"Many things" he said suggestively. "But for now, being annoying will do"
He had got up to three hundred and five ways he could kill the man. The only problem being, getting unchained from the wall. Edward was chained to the wall. It was a new one on him. He had not been trained to escape from this sort of situation. It was so old fashioned. When it came to escaping Edward was a snob. Ropes, handcuffs, drugs, combination locks: no problem. Manacles? Please! Edward groaned. His internal monologue was being to sound like Anita. Something was wrong. The author has stopped paying any attention to what should be going on. Edward shook himself out of it. He glared at the lackey that had been left to look after his beaten body. The man shivered and checked his gun. Edwards's eyes were bottomless pits of fury. The door slammed open on the other side of the room. The bad guy was back.